I am real, I am human, and there are times when I do not feel okay, when I want to wear my mask. When I am hiding my feelings from the world.

Is this okay??

Do you sometimes “lie” to the world or put up a front, hiding your true feelings? Do you sometimes wear a mask?  I guess we all do sometimes.

Wearing a mask or hiding can be okay, provided we know we are “wearing” one. (How often can we fool ourselves into believing what we want to portray!). And provided it is temporary; that we will acknowledge (and deal with!) our true emotions at some stage.

But is hiding not a lie? Are we not meant to become more authentic, more real, closer to the truth??

Consider this: Whenever I’m teaching but do not “feel” like it (we probably all feel like that at times), I have to put up a front lest I “infect” learners negatively. And with “negative” emotions, I mean those emotions we probably do not want to feel – anger, hurt, sadness, etc. I could have had a fall-out with my partner that morning, my dog could have died, or I could be really just having a bad hair day! But if I allow any negativity to be portrayed, chances are I will have less than optimal results teaching others. Oh, there might be empathy from others; I can share what I’m feeling or what has happened, but showing empathy towards me is not the responsibility of others.

Being Real

So…I might be “wearing” a mask or hiding my true feelings temporarily. I can continue to be grateful and allow positive thoughts to replace negative emotions, but come on, we’re emotional beings and we all experience less than joyful feelings at times. No matter how positive we are, these emotions are par for the course. So I am real. I am real, instead of being positive. And if I’m real, there are times when I might not feel okay, and – without being indoctrinated by “authenticity” BS. And when it will be okay to put my mask on.

Oh of course once I have this mask on, I might (and probably will) automatically be feeling better after a while. Chances are I will naturally experience a mood shift due to the physiological effect.  But in this case that is not the purpose of my mask. Its purpose is so that, even if I may not be able to spread pure joy that day (because I am human!), at least it may prevent me from spreading negative emotions!

So, I might even consider making myself a brightly coloured, crazy paper mask. To remind myself that it IS in fact a mask when I need to “wear” it, and that I need to take it off at some point, so to speak. And for a laugh!

 

About the author:

Celeste Du Toit is a transformational Life Coach, NLP practitioner, healer and inspirational speaker. She is passionate about working with people who dare to dream or think out of the box, and who long for “something more”.

Celeste runs 1:1 sessions, group workshops and retreats in which she guides people towards sustainable change. and how to implement these practices in a practical, sustainable way.

Connect with Celeste on www.yesparadigm.co.za or visit www.yesparadigm.co.za