Journey with the Goddesses –
Lakshmi and the Salsa…
When does caring become carrying??
Can I care for someone, yet free myself from carrying them? I know carrying is disempowering, and it is exhausting. But what if I’m the one responsible for care?
The question plagues me. How do I prevent myself from overstepping that fine line between caring and carrying?
So slowly an old acquaintance arrives, one that I am very familiar with: Worry. Initially, I refuse to entertain it; fighting to stay out of its claws. But it is persistent and cunning. It takes a while, toying with me, forcing its way in, tumbling me into a whirlpool of caring, carrying, crying, and confusion. Until exasperated, I stiffen in passivity. Spent.
And then Goddess Lakshmi appears to me. Beautiful Lakshmi, oozing pure Shakti, bounty, and bliss.
I am bountiful, I am beautiful, I am bliss, I am. Words from the yogic mantra fill my head and I catch myself smiling. That’s what Lakshmi does! When she appears, you feel an immediate shift, just from her energy.
She steps in purposefully and says: “Hush! Stop worrying! Remember what you create! Worry shuts out the natural goodness, it confuses your energy. “
“I can’t help it, divine Lakshmi! We humans are so used to worrying”, I replied.
Even as I say this (all internally of course!), I cringe. When did we become so indoctrinated, so overbearing, so afraid of what we don’t know, and so doubtful of the natural greatness and order of things that we use all our energy to bloody worry? And on top of that, think we actually care when we worry?!
Lakshmi gracefully steps in. “I know, and We have been trying to show you another way. I am here for you to release this. But, it will take discipline from you to release that. It takes a strong mind to let go of the need to control.”
I had never thought of it that way. It takes a strong mind to let go of the need to control. Hmm. It means that I have to have enough confidence, boldness, and trust in….in what?? In me? My abilities? In God’s abilities? The Universe? The unseen?
This time I know the answer. It is all of the above.
Lakshmi further reminds me that this is inherently a kind universe (something that so many of us have forgotten, or simply don’t believe anymore!). That by squashing my energy field through worry, I shield myself from so many other gifts that it has in store for me.
I have indeed been squashing my energy field. Worry makes me small. Passive.
Lakshmi had a solution.
She will release me, however, it comes with a price. She requires discipline, trust, and boldness from me. And the knowing that it is a dance. Caring and Releasing are dance partners. Just like Giving and Receiving. Loving and Letting Go. Through the dance, they become ONE.
I sense a very delicate dance between feminine Care and masculine Release. Care ever wanting to come closer for a sweet embrace, and Release extending Care just enough to taste the edges of the dance floor, and freedom, before reeling her in again. This dance feels like the salsa to me – active, sexy, daring, and quite intricate, the partners navigating the steps, sometimes leaning in quite closely, and sometimes pulling away… flirting, trusting.
It might take practice to perfect the steps, but I love the salsa. And besides, it’s fun!
Again I smile; this time feeling a lightness, and an urge to dance.